Random thoughts

Day V

Caught between three spaces.

Reality, surreal and something you wish didn’t exist quite about then!

I belong to a particular age and I’m not married and thankfully happily so.

I don’t want to know the complications of a married life, of in-laws and raising kids nor do I want to know how miserable life gets when you grow old. I don’t want to know what happens when someone fiercely independent becomes helpless in one go. I don’t want to know the shock and the frustration.

Yes, I don’t want to experience the frustration of having to do things on my own which previously for a long time was done for me smoothly. I do things on my own now. People around me, who I care about, are waaaaaay past that league. I understand their frustration and try and help out but hello I need to do my own things as well. Give me the time, sorry the breathing space – aur kitna jaldi?

Feel like I’m living a full existence without an anchor. Floating in and out between the three spaces.

Wanting to move towards the surreal but reality and the not so wanted reality say hey! I need you to listen to me now! If u don’t, grrrrrr…

And come to think of it, its just the beginning. Maybe I’ll learn in the near future…

I’ll fall, but I’ll recover for sure or so I believe. I still have a lot of years to live, then why don’t I feel like that?

That needs an answer and real soon.

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